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There is a very intrinsic aspect to all humans: the desire to thrive.
In our daily lives we do what we do motivated by the need to succeed and, in order to succeed, we go about life looking to improve in our career, health, earnings, our home, our children’s future, and so on. We interact with people all day – people who help us meet our daily goals.
We also look to thrive in our relationships. Because we are social beings we can’t grow and succeed without other people in our lives. We count on our teachers, caregivers, parents, bankers, doctors, financial advisers, friends, significant others, spouses and family members, who contribute to our lives one way or another.
Now, looking at the closest relationships you have: how do you thrive? What are you personally doing in the relationship? What are you giving to the relationship? What are you getting from the relationship? How do you feel in it? How do you make the other person feel? Where are you willing to improve? What do you need to ask that you are not asking? What are you willing to give that person?
You want to feel love just as much as the girl next door. But it’s important that you understand that what you get from the relationship is a direct result of what you give to it. You will get one result by saying what you need and want openly and directly and you will get a different result if you don’t say it, or if you don’t communicate openly, or if you don’t say exactly what you need and want.
Here is a hint: manipulating, threatening, disparaging and other similar strategies will not get you what you want, if what you want is long-term connection and satisfaction. These strategies grow old really fast and make the relationship become sour.
Think about it!
Flora Sofia – Founder of The Beautiful Power and co-author of the book The Change.
A day to Celebrate Revolutionary Women and Women for being Women
This date marks historical events, strikes, and demonstrations that have been fueled by the need that women have had to revolutionize together and together change our conditions. From this hunger, this endless desire to strive, to be able to make a decent living, or even to have our share of glory in life our predecessors and contemporaries have fought and won countless battles for our rights: our right to vote, to get an education, to be respected and not sexually abused and demoralized in the work place, to be treated and paid equally, our right to decide what to do with our womb.
Our accomplishments as a gender have been great and can be verified by the presence of women leaders who are acclaimed and recognized globally in different ways, different countries, and different industries, for different reasons and passions. Think of Amelia Earhart, Florence Nightingale, Mother Theresa of Calcutta, Oprah Winfrey, Rosa Parks, Marie Curie, Isadora Duncan, Madame C.J. Walker, and Madonna, to name a few.
In our essence, however, we have one thing in common: we are all women. We are the ones who bring life into the world, who nurture it, who cherish, and support it in a unique way: a feminine way. A good friend of mine just highlighted, merely 2 hours ago, what a woman represents to him, to his brothers, cousins, and peers: women bring perfume and poetry, curves and sway, beauty and fun into their world.
Yet, the same men who are enchanted by us sometimes have a hard time accepting our need for freedom. The country where I came from has very macho standards. The country I chose as my home understands sensual and sexually expressive women as whores. We struggle with this and are in a big conflict about how to go about it. It’s like: damned if you are a good girl; damned if you are a vixen. All in all as a woman who has been here and there and who is in a quest to reach greater heights and bring my girls with me, while knowing that my men (my father, my brother, my uncles, cousins, and my boyfriend) have my back no matter what, I think I can say: you guys, we want your love, we need your love, we want to feel respected, and we want you to carry one standard that will help us thrive: the one where you leave our wombs alone, take the glass ceiling out of the way, quit being naysayers to our glory, and be our friends. We want to be your queen. Be our worthy kings.
The fight is far from over. As long as there are people voting to take away women’s rights that were fiercely fought for and to demoralize our efforts to succeed we will be rolling up our sleeves and showing the world our strength.
Happy International Women’s Day.
What an Empowered Woman Looks Like
By Flora Sofia
It’s Thursday evening, you have just walked into a room full of people greeting each other, being introduced, and networking. It’s a room full of life and you are thrilled to be there because it supports your cause of choice. Through the whole night there is one thing that you (and the rest of the room) can’t help but notice: she is the most popular woman in the room.
There is this lady who has shown up with barely any makeup on, is dressed simply, people seem to be naturally drawn to, and has that serene look on her face; but you can’t put a finger on what it is about her. Intrigued yet? Well, this is one version of what an empowered woman looks like.
An empowered woman places little importance in competing with other women because she knows who she is. She intimately knows her worth, her values, the impact she makes, and her purpose. She is guided by that, as well as by how she leads her life and how she carries herself out in the world. The empowered woman knows all there is to know about her and what she is capable of – the positive and the negative – and how what she does impacts everything and everyone around her. Although she knows both sides of herself, her choice is to be in positivity. Once there, not only can she enjoy a higher level of life, but she can also bring people up along with her.
Her body: this is the temple of her soul and it is sacred to her. She uses it and does it well through dance, sports, and/or other physical activities. She feeds it high quality foods that will make it stronger, more energized, and more attractive. She shares it with only those who have shown to her that they care about what’s inside her.
Her mind: where she dreams and has ideas and where she creates her future. She keeps it sound and free of negative thoughts as much as possible and she dedicates time to clean up the old gunk, as needed.
Her heart: it’s the most precious thing; where she keeps those dear to her, where she shares from and where she resorts to in order to find out what makes her who she is.
Her soul: it’s her direct connection with the divine. It’s the everlasting essence of her, which is the very essence of her Creator; therefore, it’s what makes them One.
She is in her power and knows that her utmost priority is to belong and be happy with herself (body, mind, heart, and soul) because that is where her greatness and beauty stems from. Fulfilled and joyful, the empowered woman takes pride and is delighted to be the mother, sister, daughter, wife, lover, professional, role model she is to those in her life and to the world.
The empowered woman is mindful of how she thinks and how she treats others; her mission is to encourage those around her to ascend and reach their greatness. She will never leave someone bent out of shape. When she shows up it’s to make matters better.
And the evening ends with the actualization of the day’s realization.
When you spot the empowered woman, say hello. She is a living expression of the Creator. And so are you. Maybe you and she are the same.
Women have innate capabilities that are very important in their personal life and also to society.
For one thing, women can bear children, and that alone is a very important aspect considering they bring life to light. Women affect their surroundings in a very peculiar way and have particular characteristics that impact the world one way or another. When women are happy people see it. The same goes for when women are unhappy. What goes on inside a woman directly impacts how she acts.
The importance of women being empowered speaks to how women manage their power. And, yes, power is one thing that women have. As much as she has the power to positively influence those around her, change the mood of a room, and raise strong and happy children, a woman also has the power to destroy a child’s self esteem, break a home, and break a man’s heart.
When a woman is empowered she uses all of her innate capabilities for the good. When she is dis-empowered chances are she will behave like a desperate woman (from the housewives we see on television to the desperate next-door neighbor).
Unfortunately, it has become common for the desperate woman to prevail over the empowered woman, which has caused the demoralization of womanhood. When we have a great number of the feminine population leading their life with anger, disrespect for others, and lack of common sense, it is somewhat challenging for women as a group to receive the deserved respect.
When a woman is empowered, she knows who she is, is in harmony with it, and owns it with no shame or judgment. She is trend-setting, establishes high standards, and only looks down if she is helping someone up. When women as a group are empowered, they make everything around them better. They are high-quality individuals, outstanding professionals, nurturing and caring mothers and wives, and they make the world a better place because they exist.
In essence, women have the power to make people’s lives better with their presence and also to make someone’s life living hell.
Alright ladies and gentlemen! I would really love to get some comments or feedback at this point regarding the action steps you have received so far. You may post a comment on Facebook or via e-mail besides here on the web page.
And don’t forget to forward this to your friends and family!!!
See you soon!
Wow! I just had a very interesting (and moving) experience this weekend attending to Voices from the Soul.
So, there is this brilliant woman in San Diego who is doing a fantastic job in breaking the silence. I am referring to Warrior Woman Writer Suzanne Morse, a survivor playwright and founder of Heartfelt Voices United. Through drama, Suzanne showed to the public a wide array of aspects of the rough reality of domestic and sexual violence victims in a 2 hour skits performance that showed the point of view of the victims, their families, the attackers, and what goes on in their minds, hearts, and souls.
It is shocking… learning about the rough aspects of domestic and sexual violence, and child abuse… I can’t imagine how hard it is living through the amount of pain and suffering the girls, boys, and women who live through it (and many don’t survive it) have to endure. There are reports stating that over 37 percent of homicide victims were killed by an acquaintance, 22.2 percent were killed by a stranger, 18.4 percent by an intimate partner, 15 percent by a family member, and 5.5 percent were killed by a friend.*
Suzanne’s writing shows everything about that reality and it is refreshing to see, as it progresses, the journey that reaches a light and wholeness stage in the transformation from being VICTIM, to SURVIVOR, to an EMPOWERED and whole individual. When a person goes through such experience, she or he becomes infused with feelings of self-blame, guild, and justification for the acts of malice they went through and overcoming those feelings is imperative to put together the shattered pieces of a heart and a soul that were once created as WHOLE by the Creator of all.
Domestic and sexual violence happens on campuses, in the military; in our homes… so chances are we all know someone (or of someone) who is a victim. As women all of us share womanhood. As life bearers we have the responsibility to help break the silence. The cost of crime is very high and all of us pay for it with our tax dollars. Don’t let women and children pay with their lives.
If you know someone who is under these harsh circumstances, help them. If you know of someone who needs education in how to be empowered and how to recover and or achieve a healthy level of self-esteem, and transform their lives into positive, fulfilling lives, please share our FREE newsletter and our website with them. We exist to empower women and to guide them to having a rich life.
* (according to the NCVWR)